Ten Minutes
by trebleclefgirl
Summary: Everybody knew Sakura was a little crazy, but nobody knew it was this bad. crackishfic non-mass ItaSaku


Ten Minutes

Non-Massacre ItaSaku

Summary: Everybody knew Sakura was a little crazy, but nobody knew it was this bad. crackishfic non-mass ItaSaku

Mild Cursing Warning

Enter Standard Disclaimer about not owning the characters.

Enjoy!

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><p><strong>A-Rank Mission<strong>

**Name: Haruno, Sakura**

**Assignment: Write a continuous free write about what you are thinking or witnessing for ten minutes. **

Sakura glared at the piece of paper in her hands.

_How could Tsunade-sama think that this… this MISSION would improve my skills? Why is this A-Ranked? It should be D-RANK at best!_

Pinching the bridge of her nose, Sakura released a sigh of frustration.

_Tsunade-sama does everything for a reason. There has to be a reason for this mission. THINK, SAKURA THINK._

Spider pressure cracks started forming on the wooden doorframe as Sakura slammed her large forehead against it.

"SAKURA. STOP DEFACING KONOHA PROPERTY," Tsunade bellowed from her office.

Sakura froze at the sound of her sensei's voice. _Wait…... maybe...maybe Tsunade thinks I'm... crazy? Is she trying to do some sort of twisted psych evaluation on me? No, she wouldn't dare. I'm her prized apprentice rivaling in her own strength and genius. Unless she doesn't like that I work until I pass out from chakra depletion... or that I never leave the hospital... or that I don't have very many friends... or that I have an Inner... _

_**Inner-Sakura: Do crazy people have inner voices talking to them? **_

_Go away, Inner. I don't have time for your stupid gushing. I need to prove Tsunade-sama wrong!_ Throwing a fist into the air, Sakura shouted, "SHANNARO!"

Tsunade watched her student, concern evident in her eyes as Sakura dashed off.

* * *

><p>Jumping from roof to roof, Sakura made her way to her favorite bench in the shade. Many people call this bench the Bench of Great Misfortune, but Sakura was never one to believe in old wives-tales.<p>

_I guess there isn't a better time to start this mission. The sooner it's done the better… SHANNARO! I can do this!_

_**Inner-Sakura: You are starting to sound like Lee-san...**_

_SHUTUP. Oh wait, do I have to write that down?_

_**Inner-Sakura: Of course, genius. **_

_RE-DO, R-EDO, RE-DOOOOOO! _Setting an alarm on her watch, Sakura prepared for the longest ten minutes of her life.

_... It feels weird writing elispes- elipsis- NO, ellipsis! holy crap I can't spell. What will Tsunade think about me not being able to spell? OMG SHE WILL READ THIS. Am I allowed to write slang on a mission paper? I wonder if anyone has tried. Probably Naruto._

Sakura snickered at the thought of Naruto writing a mission report.

_It probably has something about ramen in it. I wonder if he wrote about the time that I "accidently" dropped his instant ramen in the stream. I totally blamed it on the raccoon that ransacked our campsite the night before._

_I think Sasuke knew that I did it, but he wasn't about to tell anyone once Kakashi-sensei offered to buy us lunch. I doubt he could have eaten another night of ramen either._

A small, blue colored bird approached Sakura's bench.

_Oh look, a pretty bird. Don't you think it's pretty Inner? What's attached to its foot though?_

Sakura leaned forward to inspect the blue bird a little closer.

_What the hell? It's not a messenger bird. _

Gently grasping the bird's foot, Sakura flipped over the dangling paper tag only to be met with the familiar kanji of an explosive tag.

Bird gore and feathers flew everywhere as Sakura leaped to the nearest tree.

_What was that? Who puts an explosive tag on a bird? There are probably bird bits all over me now. UGH. SO GROSS. And I have to wait until I get home to shower because of this stupid assignment._

Sakura growled at the thought of no shower but was quickly interrupted by a cheerful chirping to her left.

_OH CRAP! There is a bird to my left! Maybe if I don't look at it, the bird will go away. PLEASE GO AWAY, BIRDIE. I DID NOTHING TO YOUR KIND. GO AWAY! DON'T COME CLOSER! INNER SAAAAVE MEEEEE!_

The chirping became more insistent and appeared to be hopping closer. Very slowly and mechanically Sakura inched her head to the left.

_This bird is orange? When did Konoha get orange birds? D'awwww it's so fluffy and cuuute. Wait. Focus Sakura! The other one had a tag on it. This bundle of fluff could be kamikaze as well. _

Once again leaning forward, Sakura inspected the bird and froze when she saw a tag dangling from its left foot.

_Ok, Sakura. I think it's time to run for it. On the count of three I'm going to leap through the woods trying to not look like an idiot writing on a clipboard and avoid this kamikaze bird at the same time... ONE... OH FORGET IT THREE!_

Sakura became a pink and red blur as she raced through Konoha's forest frantically trying to escape the cute, orange bird.

_OMG. IT'S FOLLOWING ME. How am I supposed to detonate it? I'll have to stop writing for a minute so I can grab a ninja star. That should set the tag off and the bird should be gone. IT'S FLAWLESS! SHANNARO!_

Grasping a ninja star from her side pouch, Sakura gracefully flung it at the orange bird. The orange bird disappeared in a poof of smoke as the tag detonated on contact.

_Kage Bunshin? So the orange ones are clones and the blue ones are real birds, but both have explosive tags. But how are the real birds seeking people out? Is someone testing out a new jutsu? What if it was attracted to a civilian? WHOEVER IT IS NEEDS TO GET THEIR BUTT KICKED. Someone could have been seriously injured. I don't want to patch people up at the hospital because of "exploding birds."_

At this point Sakura had stopped moving and clung to the tree with her chakra, but she failed to notice a new blue bird to her right.

_I mean that poor person that would've had to come into the hospital with bird injuries would be made into the laughing stock of the century. Who would honestly believe that "exploding birds" exist? And what kind of ninja wouldn't be able to dodge or kill a bird? _

Her rant was cut short as a sharp chirp was heard from her right. Looking over, Sakura could clearly see a little, blue bird at her right foot.

_You cannot be serious. There's another bird and it's a blue one too. Why are they so attracted to me? _

The little, blue bird was soon joined with many other orange and blue birds in the trees. The chirping was deafening and it was really getting on Sakura's nerves.

_STOP FREAKING CHIRPING, BIRDS. LEAVE ME ALONE. I guess there isn't anywhere for me to go. I'll just have to run into the village and hope I can outrun th-_

Innocently touching Sakura's leg, the blue bird exploded in a bloody and feathery mess. A strangled cry left Sakura's mouth as her ankle started bleeding and developing the signs of a severe burn.

_AHHHHHHHH! THAT HURTS! TIME TO RUN FOR IT!_

Sakura bolted through the forest and headed straight for the rooftops hoping for some sort of reprieve.

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><p>Casually leaping from rooftop to rooftop, Uchiha Itachi had returned from another successful mission.<p>

Out of the corner of his eye he saw a blur of pink and red in the distance. What made him pause was the cloud of what appeared to be birds following close behind.

Turning on his sharingan, he carefully examined the birds. The blue ones looked to be live birds that were caught in a genjutsu with exploding tags, and the orange ones were just shadow clones with exploding tags.

_Why hasn't she disposed of them yet?_

Itachi tucked some of his raven locks behind his ear and examined Sakura closer. She really did appear to be distressed. Blood splatters and feathers spotted her person and there was a cut or burn on her right ankle. She was also holding a clipboard and frantically writing on it instead of killing the birds. Itachi raised an eyebrow at this, but did not query further.

That was, of course, until she blindly ran towards a power line at a frighteningly fast speed.

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><p><em>WHY ARE THESE BIRDS STILL FOLLOWING ME? I have to get them off of my tail! This is getting so annoying. If only I could use both of my hands! They would be smashed to smithereens and I would be on my merry, little way. But NO. I had to have this mission right now, right when someone is trying out a new jutsu, and on ME of all people. WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO, INNER? WHAT?<em>

Unbeknownst to Sakura, she was rapidly approaching a power line on the next rooftop.

_I'll never be able to prove to Tsunade that I'm not crazy if I can't kill a few birds. Everyone would be like, "What happened to your apprentice Tsunade?" And she would have to tell them that I was killed in action...by birds. I AM NOT CRAZY. I WILL NOT FAIL THIS MISSION. SHANNAR-_

It happened in slow motion. Sakura would swear it happened in slow motion and she would have rather died from falling off of the roof or even from the birds than what happened next.

_DID I JUST TRIP OVER A POWER LINE? I'M FALLING! OMG I'M FALLING OFF OF A RO- _

Someone materialized behind her and wrapped their arms around her shielding her from the fall.

With her eyes squeezed shut, Sakura continued writing blindly.

_Wait. I'm not falling anymore. I landed on my feet? And there are warm arms around me. Warm, ANBU armor-plated arms. What is going on... _

She opened her eyes in time to see fire erupt from the person's mouth behind her and swallowed all of the birds in flames as the birds descended towards the both of them.

_Uchiha? Oh no... It's not Sasuke, he has a clan stuff to do...that means...it's..._

Dread blossomed at the pit of her stomach and spread faster than fear.

_Itachi._

Completely paralyzed by anxiety, Sakura failed to notice that her paper was smoldering in the upper right corner.

Itachi calmly released his hold of her and proceeded to snuff out the small fire on her paper between two fingers. Out of reflex, Sakura tried to wrestle the clipboard out of his hand and hold it closer to her chest while still trying to write on it.

_He can't read this. HE CAN'T READ THIS. HE ABSOLUTELY CANNOT READ THIS. He probably already thinks I'm a freak and that I will never be good enough for ANBU. I can't have him think I'm even crazier. I've always wanted to be the first medic that made it to ANBU. I WILL PROVE TO HIM THAT I AM NOT CRAZY TOO. WATCH ME! _

Itachi continued to watch Sakura as she pulled the clipboard out of his grasp. He raised his eyebrow at the thought of her assuming he wanted to know what was on the paper. He certainly had more class than to read over someone's shoulder. Whatever was on that paper was clearly important enough for her to risk her life for it. But before he could voice his concerns, she spoke.

"Uchiha-san. I am terribly sorry to waste your time. Thank you for helping me... um... land safely." Sakura said as she sheepishly looked at him.

_Oh crap. I guess I have to write it down. Uchiha-san. I am terribly sorry to waste your time. Thank you for helping me safely land. OMG I MUST LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT WRITING AS I SAY STUFF. _

Itachi stared blankly back at her but followed her movements to continue writing. Sakura is definitely a...different...kind of kunoichi.

"Be careful of the power lines next time," Itachi blankly stated, still glancing between Sakura and the clipboard that she was clutching to her chest.

A light blush dusted Sakura's face as she noticed Itachi staring at her.

_He must really think I'm weird. Inner, what should I do? Should I tell him it's a mission? That might clear some things up..._

"It's for a mission," Sakura explained, feeling like a fool. "."

_It's for a mission. . Quick! Leave before he can reply!_

Sakura jumped to the rooftops once more and disappeared from sight.

_A different kind of kunoichi indeed_, thought Itachi as he too disappeared from sight.

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><p><em>That was so embarrassing. I had to be saved by UCHIHA ITACHI of all people. His fan girls will freak if they knew that I fell off of a roof and he caught me. His arms did feel really nice- NO, STOP IT. YOU WILL NOT BECOME A SNIVELING FANGIRL. HE IS A STUCKUP UCHIHA THAT JUST HAPPENS TO SAVE PEOPLE THAT FALL OFF OF ROOFS. You should be focusing on earning his RESPECT.<em>

_**Especially since he must think you are weird.**_

_What a time to show up Inner. WHERE WERE YOU ALL OF THE OTHER TIMES I NEEDED YOUR HELP? HUH?_

_**...**_

_Oh, so you are silent now. WHATEVER. I need to finish this mission anyways._

Pausing on a rooftop, Sakura thought about where a good place to go would be.

_I think the best place to finish this mission is my apartment. I'm heading in that direction anyways, and I only have a few more minutes left. At least those birds are gone. It doesn't look like there are any more in sight. THANK GOODNESS. I really thought it was going to be death-by-birds there for a minute. _

Sakura released a sigh as she unlocked the front door to her apartment.

_It's good to be home. I'm glad I moved out from my parent's place last year. I'm sure they would have freaked out with how I probably look right now. Ugh. I smell terrible too. Is this mission over yet?_

Glancing at her watch, Sakura notices that she still had two minutes left to the mission.

_Two whole, long minutes left. Hopefully I can relax for those last two minutes._

Something itchy was on Sakura's hand and she scratched at it, but it wasn't going away.

_What is on my hand? It's so itchyyyyy. Wait...it feels...fuzzy?_

Looking down, she notices a massive spider on her left hand.

_AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! SPIDER SPIDER SPIDER SPIDER SPIDER SPIDER!_

Sakura's blood curdling scream echoed throughout Konoha as she slowly backed out of her apartment.

_OMG GET IT OFF OF ME IT'S A SPIDER EW EW EW EW EW EW!_

Frantically shaking her left hand, she tried to dislodge the spider but it still clung fast. She backed out of her apartment further only to slip on the top step and tumble backwards down the stairs.

_Owwwww. That really hurt... I hope nobody saw that._

Her hopes were quickly squashed as she looked up from the ground to notice a pair of blue sandals.

_Seriously? I guess I shouldn't be too surprised since this mission has been nothing but trouble. _

Sakura stood up slowly to face none other than Uchiha Itachi. She wiped what she thought was sweat from her forehead only to realize it was blood.

_Great. Now I have a freaking cut ON MY ALREADY LARGE FOREHEAD– …Why is he staring at me so strangely? _

Itachi had just happened to be in the area. Or, at least, that's what he'd told himself. It wasn't like he was concerned for her safety when he heard her scream bloody murder. He was merely in the area and decided to see what the commotion was about. What he had found though was quite a sight to behold.

He found Sakura, still writing on the clipboard, tumbling down some stairs before landing quite ungracefully at the bottom. He still wasn't quite sure what all of the commotion was about until she managed to stand up.

There, on her head, was a quite large, hairy spider.

_OMG He is totally judging me. There is no way he'll let me pass my ANBU exam. He'll say I'm WEIRD and CLUMSY. Super clumsy. So clumsy that I couldn't possibly belong in ANBU. This mission sucks and I hope that Tsunade is the only person who reads this and then the paper is burned and then the ashes are swept away an-_

Her rant was cut short as Itachi reached for head.

_WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING? WHAT'S ON MY HEAD? ... OMG T-THE SPIDER! _

Itachi resisted the urge to smirk at the emotions that passed through Sakura's emerald eyes. She was clearly smart enough to conclude that the spider was still on her person and she was quite afraid of it.

Grasping the spider by a leg, Itachi flung the poor creature into the bushes. He saw no reason to end its life. It was probably just as scared as Sakura was.

Sakura was so petrified that she could do nothing but watch as Itachi came closer and grabbed the spider off of her head. Her only coherent thought at that moment was:

_He smells nice._

An amused glint appeared in Itachi's charcoal eyes as he watched Sakura recover from her spider incident. Who would have thought that she was so scared of spiders?

_Am I imagining things? Is he amused? I swear I see amusement in his eyes. Is he laughing at me? OH HELL NO. _

Sakura glared as hard as she could at Itachi and was about to open her mouth to retort when her watch alarm went off.

"I'm done," Sakura said, a large grinning forming on her face. "I'm done. I'm finally done!"

She really would have jumped for joy if Itachi wasn't there.

Itachi merely continued to stare at her with a blank expression waiting for her to elaborate.

'Thanks for getting that spider Uchiha-san," Sakura said looking at the ground and smiling in embarrassment. "I really hate spiders."

"Hn," Itachi replied.

Looking up and into Itachi's eyes with a huge grin on her face, she said, "I need to hand in this mission report. I guess I'll see you around."

Itachi watched Sakura jump across the rooftops once again, this time heading for the Hokage's office.

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><p>Bursting into Tsunade's office, Sakura slammed her report down on Tsunade's desk.<p>

In one glance, Tsunade took in Sakura's disheveled appearance. She noted how Sakura was covered in animal pieces, feathers, blood, and how she now had a burn on her ankle and a cut on her forehead.

Glancing down at the crumpled report, she noticed matching animal pieces, feathers, and blood, along with a burnt corner. _What trouble did this girl get into? _

Raising an eyebrow Tsunade asked, "How did it go?"

"The mission was a success," Sakura replied. "If you would allow it, I would like to request a week off from missions and the hospital."

"Request granted," Tsunade answered. "Go get some rest and take a shower Sakura."

Sakura bowed and left the room.

Tsunade sighed. It was about time that Sakura took some time off. That was the whole point of giving her that mission anyways. I just didn't think it would work so well. Maybe it would work just as well for Itachi...

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><p><em>There is no way that Tsunade can think I'm crazy now<em>, thought Sakura as she was leaving the Hokage tower.

Jumping up and throwing a fist into the air Sakura shouted, "SHANNARO!"

Knocking on the door, Itachi entered Tsunade's office.

"Hokage-sama, the mission was successful," Itachi explained handing in his report.

"Excellent. I will have another mission for you in the morning," Tsunade informed him, her eyes not leaving Sakura's report.

Itachi turned to leave, but was stopped by Tsunade's voice.

"Itachi, do you know who "Inner" is?"

"I do not," came Itachi's expressionless reply. His thoughts went back to seeing Sakura a few minutes ago. _And I certainly do not want to know._

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><p>AN: I wrote my first story! Yay! A special thanks goes out to my best friend for proofreading this. :)

Please review! Thanks!


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